Autism equates to news stories; but the news does not change what actually occurs in our homes or hearts does it?
Autism equates to statistics; but statistics do nothing to help us work through the struggles of the day or the joys we experience that often are unseen or can not be understood by others.
Autism equates to stares and judgement; but stares and judgement does nothing to ease the burden of an already troubled heart.
Autism also also means so much more! Autism is more than a statistic, it is more than a news story that you half listen to or change the station. Autism is a word that someones child is hidden inside of. It is a word that traps a little person from expressing their basic need, from experiencing the world in a way that the people they love can completely understand. Autism is not a specific size or shape, hence the puzzle pieces. It is different for every child and every family.
What many don't realize is that behind every child with autism is a mother and a father, brother's and sisters whose lives are unlike other families. They work day and night, night and day, every day without vacation or time off for good behavior to help their most precious child join their world and help experience joy in the world they live in. They don't change their schedules without consequences, they don't go to the food store without apprehension and prayer with their child, they know 'critical meltdown' is part of daily experiences. Sometimes they long for a trip to gas station to clear their head or they cry over the fact that their child will not be receiving a birthday invitation and if they did that might be a night mare also. A day in the life of a family with autism is an adventure and sometimes a nightmare but always a learning experience. Always a journey of love if it is done right.
'Autistic' mom's are powerfully strong, they are fighters like Navy Seals. They should not be crossed in the care of their child nor should they be denied services without a fight. They work hard sleep little and research a lot.They can ruffle other people's feathers and will do what they know they need to for the best of their most special little person or people. You see they have been entrusted with a special gift from God. Some of the most precious things in this world need the greatest care. They need constant monitoring as do our children with autism. All children are gifts from God each comes with different wrapping, some wrapping is thick and can be dealt with roughly without damage, some is very beautiful, some humorous, some is very fragile like tissue paper and must be treated with tremendous care. Each wrapper is valuable but some need so much more care than others to keep it protected. Our children with autism are a lot like that tissue paper, thin and easily damaged. They need someone who is willing to care for them constantly and those are the people God blesses with children with autism. If we remember clearly none of the children bestowed upon us actually belong to us, they are all God's and we have been chosen as his babysitters. Some of us have been chosen to babysit for his most fragile crystal.
Our precious gems don't make strides that are measured in "leaps and bounds" they are measured in tiptoes and blinks but we are equally excited even if you do not understand. We may not post our children's report cards on facebook but we are shouting from the mountain tops when our children smile 'at' us or laugh independently. We "burst at the seams" when they use the toiled independently even if they are 14 and we cry with jubilation when they give us a hug or let us hug them; which so many parents don't realize is not to be taken for granted. It is not natural to all children. for some it has to be taught and tolerated. We would never deny you your joys but ask that you please try to understand ours.
For some mom's of autistic children we smile when you make thoughtless comments and try to explain but cry our selves to sleep at night wondering about what you take for granted. Will my child ever live independently, will they love someone, will they marry. Who will care for them when I die.
Even though we have those moments of cares and fears they are not burdens and neither are our children. Please don't suggest that they are if you don't want a fire fight. Be an ear and a smile. Find joy in our joys and a shoulder without judgement on tough days. Understand we can't always be at parties, at events or even at church. Sometimes we need to take turns because many places are not the right fit for or kids. Don't sit in judgement, you would not want to walk in our shoes, you would not consider walking in our shoes by choice so why should you judge the steps those shoes take?
Through our journey we have learned that joy comes at great expense, that is a gift. We have learned that a child's smile is the most precious blessing, that is a gift. That hugs are never to be taken for granted, that is a gift. That struggles and hardship makes you stronger and builds character, that is a gift. That autism is a family affair that can pull you all closer than you could imagine if Christ is the center and that is a wonderful gift. At the end of the night when our little one's sleep and peace settles on the house and you can look on the day and pull at the gains and know they outweigh the fails you know that Christ has been your companion all day and that is the greatest gift of all, because He loved you enough to trust you with His precious treasure. With His help together your family will find on your journey a closeness you never knew possible and sitting there in your lives is a little person that helped make that possible, your gift from God.
Praying blessings upon your journey today!
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